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Tuesday, August 24th 2021

Boobs!

I'm getting new titties!

I'll soon be taking a break (see my profile for the countdown...), probably around 6-8 weeks, from entertaining you lovely gents as there's a pretty intense recovery period. I'm also currently blonde, the picture is me!

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Titty history

I've wanted a boob job for around 10 years. I used to have the most incredible rack, it would knock me out if I jumped. However I lost a lot of weight when I was younger through healthy diet and exercise, from 70kg down to 50kg (154lb-110lb), and my boobs made sure I noticed it! After that I spent a lot of time in the gym and I worked on creating a body that I loved instead of one that just got me from A to B. Unfortunately there's no amount of exercise that can increase the size of one's tits, and the extra time in the gym building muscle and getting lean meant they took even more of a hit.

The panini has taken a bit of a toll in that I no longer have a 6 pack and I'm a little softer to cuddle than I was 2 years ago, but my boobs will never look how I want them to look unless I'm obese, or I get implants. I'm not too bothered how they look when I'm covered up, but I spend most of my time naked even when I'm not with one of you gents, so I see them an awful lot!

I like my boobs now, I just don't love them like I love the rest of my body, and I'm very fortunate that I'm in a position where I can change that (thank you Polar <3). The longer I've wanted this, the more I've wanted it, it's not a rushed decision by any means. I've mentioned it previously to a few of you who I'm more familiar with, and every single one of you has said "but you don't need one!" and I know I don't need one. This decision is purely based on something I want that will make me intensely happy for years to come, it's not for anyone else.

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Recovery

The first 2 weeks will be awful. Pray for me. Or send money and Deliveroo.

Depending on how the recovery goes after that, I might start seeing a few of my more GFE type clients before the 6 week mark, but I will likely have to keep some sort of bra on for the duration and make you pinky promise that you won't touch. I won't do anything that might risk affecting my healing though, so please be patient if I tell you to wait.

I may offer reduced services at reduced rates, although I won't know for sure until the time comes.

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Rates

Once I'm back fully working as normal I will be increasing my rates. This has nothing to do with the boobs, it's because my rates have been the same for 5 years while my bills have not. My regulars will stay on the same rates for a while, but please don't assume that I consider you a regular, and please don't be offended if I don't. I'll let you know the rate when you book.

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Rosie xx

Monday, April 27th 2020

Highs, lows, and accordion dildos.

A warm welcome

We wanted flying cars in 2020 and all we got was a shitty pandemic and a US president who should probably test out that Clorox treatment on himself. I kinda miss 2016 when it was just clowns running round with knives trying to kill people.

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The apocalypse has been fun

Apart from the whole "society is collapsing" thing, as an introvert who hates agreeing to plans but also hates it when people make plans without me, this has been quite a satisfying time. I've made and donated some face masks, completed YouTube, taken up crafting with epoxy resin (probably should have kept one of those face masks), and spent far too much money on ridiculous sex toys. Since when did handheld fucking machines exist?!

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Webcam

I've bought myself a nice shiny new laptop so that I can cam! I used my old one to unintentionally mop up a drink and it wasn't quite the same after that. I tried webcamming about 4 years ago but I didn't set out with any particular shows or themes in mind and it wasn't all that successful, there seemed to be much more waiting around than fucking myself. This time I have some very specific shows planned, and also everyone is at home grounded, so I'm hopeful that it will be a lot more fun than before. I have a handheld fucking machine now, so I'll be having fun either way.

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To my regulars

I've found myself missing a lot of my regulars recently, I do genuinely enjoy your company and enjoy our sessions (and not just because you pay me). We may not know each other's real names, but I do consider you friends!

Special thank you to JFM for being my biggest supporter, before and during this, you've kept me sane but you already know that. Missing roleplay man, who has by far been the most creative with all of his wacky and immensely enjoyable scenes. I was an app controlled sex robot once! The man in Worthing who I've been seeing longer than any other, I miss having your balls on my face and our chats about the world. I have two gents who I fist fairly often, one of them hasn't been able to visit for ages, but I recently put my foot inside the other. Almost died when I tried to step in the shower afterwards, great fun. N who loves my grey socks, glad I got to show off my new school uniform to you before all of this hit, I'd say that was the most fun we've had for a while! And thank you to the few almost-regulars who I saw a lot in the more recent Beforetimes, you know who you are.

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Intellectual property is a thing right?

I've seen a lot of profiles that are remarkably similar to mine in format but with slightly different wording, and that's absolutely fine, flattering even. Should I be flattered or offended however when someone whose profile picture is a blurry and disembodied vulva copies and pastes entire chunks of my profile, and then emails me for clarification on a certain part so they can add it in, and then tells me I have no self respect and I'm a 'bundle of joy' for asking them not to? Asking for a friend.

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This isn't Tinder

I started escorting about 5 years ago, and I've had my fair share of clients who are either first timers, extremely nervous, autistic, or just intentionally awkward, I can take those in my stride. I've never once had to leave a booking early for any reason. I've never had anybody try to get away with not paying. Guess what happened for the first time since the Rona hit?

PSA gents, spending 10 minutes trying to stare into her soul while making painful small talk and asking her if she ever feels nervous when she meets new clients and if she's ever had any bad experiences with clients (what a scummy question to ask regardless), is probably not the best way to make her feel comfortable enough to allow the business to start before you've paid her. "I didn't know I would need cash, I'll bank transfer afterwards" doesn't quite cut it sir, I'm leaving.

The client I had later that same evening was a first timer too. He had the cash in my hand before I'd even put my bag down, fed me chocolates, had a heavenly cock, and spent the entire 90 minutes thanking and complimenting me while fucking me senseless. Thank you nice Polish man.

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Facepalm

And finally, no, I don't need a stunt cock for webcam thank you. If I do, I'll ask one of the last 500 of you who offered. I have a handheld fucking machine now anyway, did I mention?