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| Thursday, October 31st 2024 |
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| put the needle on the record... |
I will never learn.
If an event takes place west of Pimlico, it is not for me. If it takes place far enough West to be in Zone 3, I should dismiss it instantly and not even think about going. If I am at such an event and find myself counting the number of people with sunglasses on their heads even though the sun is well on the way down and won’t be back for a good eleven hours: abort mission and proceed in an easterly direction faster than a badger with it’s arse on fire. These are not my people.
So with apologies to Annie Mac, Before Midnight was £50-something well spent to remind me that we are not in fact all the same, and that suburbs are best left to those who are familiar with their protocols. I’ll stick with Fabric, Koko and their tackier but even more friendly sister, Day Fever in Soho; an over thirties disco which starts at 3pm prompt and finishes at 8pm (next event 16th November) and save my money. I may also save some curious looks; I still don’t know whether these arose from my lack of sunglasses or just my not being drunk (or drinking) at 5pm.
The following Sunday’s afternoon live stream of The Marriage Of Figaro was a different matter altogether, mostly because I had some strong tea and a double size Milky Bar but also because visiting your lovely local cinema to watch a live opera from barely a mile away is an extremely comforting and civilised way to spend any Sunday afternoon, even given that MoF is basically Hollyoaks with singing. There are lots more streaming events coming up at the Barbican too – yay!
Meanwhile the weather has finally committed itself, and the pouring rain notwithstanding, autumn is here! My favourite time of year by far, not least for the extra hour in bed last Sunday but the London Film Festival – many of the entries are appearing in cinemas now or soon (Anora, Blitz, The Apprentice) but my favourite of all Piece By Piece is just over a week away on Friday 8th and Lego Snoop did not disappoint. None of these are any excuse for not going to see The Substance before it’s run finally ends, however. Do that now.
November being the peaceful time that it is, there are relatively few exciting plans on the horizon until I duck out for a couple of days at the very end of the month; availability will be pretty much as advertised and more flexible than usual assuming notice starting with next week – yay! If this reads like code for the weather is crap, it’s dark all the time so I don’t feel like going out much that is indeed the case, but a bit of hibernating never hurt anyone.
More soon! I’m (unusually) here on Saturday this week too, so if anybody fancies calling in before I set off for the fireworks, just get in touch…
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| Wednesday, September 11th 2024 |
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| when we say cypress you say... |
And it’s two months on from my first trip ever to the Royal Albert Hall, despite my first ever gig in London being thirty six and a bit years ago in 1987 (The Cure at Wembley Arena, for anybody interested) and Cypress Hill did not disappoint. I’ve said it before, but the problem with summer on the blog is that the more time I spend out doing fun, exciting things, the less time I have to write about doing fun exciting things and then we wind up with gaps.
Within this recent gap we’ve had some of the hottest days of the year (and this year with no aircon; thankfully my Meaco fan has coped admirably), trips to the Tate for some Expressionism, the Design Museum for Barbie (which made for the second trip to Kensington inside six weeks when added to the Cypress Hill gig at the RAH back in July) and closer to home, the Barbican (art gallery-conservatory-library and many, many trips to the cinema).
Even FrightFest has been and gone, which gives me the opportunity to throw in a recommendation for The Substance (should be everywhere from the 20th September) to go with this weeks’ tips for Kneecap, Blink Twice and finally Sing Sing which I saw yesterday and can’t recommend highly enough, although I bawled so much at the end that I had to stay in my seat until the very last credit or risk embarrassing myself in Waitrose. In my defence I was still a bit frazzled after an energetic afternoons’ clubbing at Koko in Camden last Saturday and could have done with a bit more sleep, but the Peach 31st birthday party doesn’t come round every day, and Koko is too pretty to pass on.
Yesterday morning it was once again time for the annual teeth-grinding battle to get London Film Festival tickets; bar last year (which went so smoothly it was just plain weird) every single time is an endless-buffering, sanity-testing nightmare, and whilst I got my tickets in the end it took a full two hours and three separate log ins to avoid being kicked off with a full basket and losing all eight after the forty minute timeout. I wish I didn’t speak from experience, although eight is a lot even for me – I had no idea how badly I wanted to see the life of Pharrell Williams played out by Lego figures until the seconds were ebbing away and the panic set in. Roll on October!
The evenings are getting gradually darker, the heat is abating nicely and my favourite time of year approaches; the coming week is a busy one with theatre tomorrow and an early finish on Friday for Before Midnight at Gunnersbury Park, then a nice cosy (and a lot cheaper than the Royal Opera House itself, plus popcorn is not frowned upon) streaming of the Marriage Of Figaro this Sunday afternoon over the road at Barbican 3. Being the philistine that I am it will always be the music from the beginning of Trading Places to me, but there’s nothing wrong with that after all…
So this week - patchy, although daytimes bar Friday are OK so far. Next week I will definitely be staying in...
More soon.
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| Wednesday, June 26th 2024 |
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| go wild in the country... |
And after an unforeseen but brief blog hiatus thanks to unforeseen fuckery, it’s business as (almost) usual, and everything is ticking over nicely!
The intervening time has seen a nice walk down to the Tate Modern to see the Expressionists, sadly without Franz Marcs Yellow Cow (but plenty of others to make up for it), followed by my regular evening with Mark Kermode at the BFI; the refits going on at the South Bank have moved this over to the IMAX for the last three months and also the next two (or possibly three) where endless fun can be had while trying to remember how to find the entrance. As is the case every May the big highlight was Eurovision, and I managed to make a pretty good week of it even if I did have to watch some of one and all of the other semi final on catch up (which meant avoiding everything Eurovision related until I had the chance to sit down). Thank God for Iplayer.
The final ended in robbery for Croatia, but as with Finland last year and the UK the year before that, it’s par for the course and Rim Tim Tagi Dim by Baby Lasagna is still getting regular outings on my Spotify. The biggest hit of the night: even after eating half my body weight in hot dogs and chocolate crispies I still managed to leap off the couch for a dance to Crying At The Discoteque by Alcazar leap might be a bit strong.
As of next weekend we’ll be almost in July and the longest day of the year has already been and gone! This last few weeks have seen (amongst other things) this years’ Flamenco Festival at Sadler’s Wells (olé!) plus a razz into town for 90’s crowdpleaser Man Bites Dog at the Prince Charles, and most excitingly of all, my first trip in almost ten years to Champney’s …where I am now.
An unexpected special offer and a definite need for a break having got the moving house, decorating and general twattery out of the way has brought me to Tring, an outpost somewhere between London and Milton Keynes for a bit of R&R. Fellow hayfever sufferers – and mine starts the engine if I see a picture of a lawn – bring pharma. There are actual FIELDS; ones that are next to other fields. Not parks (visible buildings around the periphery, usually a few bins and a seat or two), fields.
Not being a country person the journey was something of a trial; travelling by car is something I do a handful of times a year and never if I can avoid it, but I didn’t fancy a route march through bushes and nettles along the edges of roads the width of the pavement on my street, so grudgingly, a taxi was summoned. I have spent the time since arrival either languishing on a big cushion in my dressing gown or stuffing my face so no real change bar the setting, but not having to do any cooking, cleaning or laundry is worth every penny. I will be back to enjoy the delights of proper infrastructure late tomorrow evening (and do bear in mind that this is a copypaste from my actual blog, written a couple of days ago ), but some swimming and a sauna first.
To the week ahead; business as usual from Wednesday to Friday and I promise I will no longer smell of pool. Next week will be Monday pm to Thursday only; nobody wants to be in the same room as me when I’ve been up all night (not even me) and election allnighters have been one of my non negotiable mainstays since the days of Peter Snow and the Swingometer. I don’t intend to miss a second of this one.
More soon! The relaxation room awaits...
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| Tuesday, April 23rd 2024 |
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| and they're up! |
After a lot of faff and fanfare, a couple of aborted attempts and even this last successful try almost coming to grief too upon the discovery that the phone-holding bit attached to my ancient tripod has had a fairly crucial component snapped off somewhere along the line, there are new pictures!
As someone who loathes having a camera pointed anywhere in their general direction more than almost anything else (to the extent that if somebody is taking photos in public the most they’ll get is my back while I walk swiftly in the opposite direction), I consider this a done deal now for a good long while. A few new backdrops (which will look familiar to some already) make life a lot easier, but Christ, it’s one of the few parts of my jobs that is a real chore and one I’m in no rush to repeat.
By way of making my different strokes for different folks point, this last weekend I have also finished all my accounts for the last year and even more enjoyably, built my new spreadsheets for the next – yay! With the admin almost out of way and the weather definitely on the up, the opportunity to get out and about has been grabbed with both hands, and I spent a lively hour with the London Symphony Orchestra over at the Barbican the other evening (a seat for the Half Six Fix on a Wednesday can be had for £10 and I was out, over to Waitrose and home again in time for dinner) plus time beforehand for a look at Purple Hibiscus, where the lakeside bit of the Barbican Centre has been wrapped in handwoven purple fabric and embroidered garments from Ghana. It’s sadly not permanent, but will be cheering the place up until August.
Unfortunately I also went to see the Amy Winehouse biopic, against my better judgement. My better judgement (as always) was right all along and I left in a foul mood until I happened across a pack of cinnamon rolls that I’d bought in the yellow sticker and forgotten about, and all was right with the world once again. Seriously though, just don’t; go and see Civil War instead (or don’t go at all). OR, continue the 90’s nostalgia with a bit of Portishead! The Barbican cinema is screening Live at Rosedale NYC in a couple of weeks and I will be there, quite possibly with some more cinnamon rolls. I’ll likely forgo them for Cypress Hill in July, mind.
In other news, and as the eagle-eyed may have noticed from the pictures, my old glasses are back! Actually not quite – I am currently navigating the new world of varifocals and have so far managed to successfully do the grocery shopping without breaking every bone in my body, but not a great deal else. Unfortunately while the reading part is fabulous the distance vision is crap, and since I’m getting tired of flagging down the wrong bus I may be heading back to the opticians for a tune up assuming I can remain in one piece for long enough to get to Covent Garden. Leaving the actual need to be able to see properly aside, I’m still very glad to be back in my proper frames. I missed them.
Back to this week, and it’s business as usual – it’s a busy time of year, so try to book a day ahead if you can! I don’t like having to turn away anybody who texts after 12 noon any more than those texting like me doing so, but at the moment it’s pretty much par for the course. My days and hours are right there on the site as ever, so lets hope the weather holds too!
More soon! Time to try and make dinner without burning down the building or any trips to A&E. Fingers crossed.
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| Friday, March 29th 2024 |
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| Happy Easter! |
Easter is here, and a four day weekend! I’ll keep this one fairly brief after the behemoth of last week, as time is ticking.
The current Bank Holiday plan (as ever) means having more to do than any normal work day, that being finishing the decorating, putting up shelves and assembling a flat pack, hanging some pictures and cooking an Easter dinner at some point, as well as nipping into town for an (overdue) eye test and possibly a film or two at the Prince Charles while I’m there. My favourite of last years’ London Film Festival Late Night With The Devil is finally among us; a must-see for any religious holiday, (and pretty much any other day too!)
A festive trip to Aldi in anticipation has taken place (if nothing else they have the best chocolate) and my phone will be off until Tuesday morning; anybody wanting to book then would be well advised to get in early on the day, although I may look at it briefly on Monday afternoon in between chocolate and leftover lamb pittas. If you’ve texted and I haven’t answered, that’s why (not to mention being up a ladder for most of the day), but I will be here next Saturday to make up for it before heading over to ExCel for the supremely serious business of the 2024 Pokémon Europe International Championships on Sunday – battle commencing time TBC. Wish me luck!
In other news, and after an hour in the Royal Albert Hall online waiting room followed by another hour in the online queue, I managed to get a ticket for Cypress Hill with the London Symphony Orchestra in July – yay! The seat is admittedly not what I’d hoped for, but nobody is in front of me and they sold out so quickly I’m counting myself lucky to have got anything at all; a look at Viagogo this morning showed some fairly unremarkable spots being touted on at £200+, so my modest £79 outlay is looking like a bargain. Now all I have to do is find how to get to the Royal Albert Hall since in sixteen years of working in London (and twenty+ of spending whatever downtime I could afford here) I don’t believe I’ve ever been, although my memory is crap and I’m prepared to be corrected.
On with the R&R then - Happy Easter everybody! More soon...
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| Wednesday, March 20th 2024 |
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| fifty eight days later... |
A few weeks on, and everything is steadily returning to normal, the unpacking is just about done with (and is gradually morphing into the being-terrified-things-I-can’t-find-have-got-lost; my clothes brush is currently number one on the list) and we’re even come out the other side of Oscars night again!
Even though I have little time – in theory – for the organisation that completely overlooked Midsommar and Uncut Gems and favoured Forrest Gump over Pulp Fiction, I just about succeeded in my mission to see all the Best Film nominees in time for the ceremony, admittedly bar the handful you couldn’t pay me to sit through (Oppenheimer, Poor Things, Maestro), so not an entirely fair and objective undertaking. I did get through American Fiction, Zone Of Interest, Past Lives, Anatomy Of A Fall and Killers Of The Flower Moon as well as Barbie, which seems like eons ago now but was well worth another watch as a reminder.
I left Killers Of The Flower Moon not just until the last minute (eminently doable with a cinema fewer than five minutes’ walk away), but late enough that I walked back through my door fifteen minutes after the ITV coverage started – three and a half hours of film immediately followed by three and a half hours of TV was punishing stuff indeed (and it’s no wonder my eyesight is so terrible), but it was worth it to see Godzilla Minus One get the visual effects award, not to mention the Kens all back together – yay! I did wonder whether I’d inadvertently nodded off when Slash from Guns & Roses appeared.
The new-venue nerves are thankfully settling down, and it’s all getting very much back to normal which is a relief for the stress levels, as is the slowing down of the new-venue purchases and the subsequent effect on the credit card bill. I remember moving into my fully furnished Monument flat costing me just under £2K in stuff I didn’t have, so given that I have bought paint, pictures, new lights, curtains and curtain poles, shelving and a new mattress (amongst other things), the AMEX has taken something of a kicking.
For anybody who wants to know, possibly the best thing I’ve bought this time is the IKEA garlic press at £3.50 – a gamechanger equal only to the little non stick frying pan that cost about seven quid – and the giant sea urchin-esque light shade which took me ten minutes to build, and over an hour to find a ceiling light it would fit on. The fourth and final (for now) descaling of the kettle has also taken place; a sentence I was starting to think I would never type, but I suspect its capacity has probably increased by half a litre at least. An honorary mention too for the Hello Klean shower head, even if the spelling makes my eyes hurt.
In between decorating, unpacking, rewiring light fittings, moving pictures around and scrubbing limescale off everything in sight I have found time to get over to the BFI for Mark Kermode in 3D, which I got a ticket to after noticing it was at the IMAX while NFT1 is being faffed about with; the last time I was in the IMAX being when I went to see Jaws last summer (I think), and both that time and this I was filled with smug self regard after finding the entrance on the first attempt. I have spent a Sunday afternoon sitting amongst the cacti and orchids in the Barbican Conservatory, had a nice walk down to Paternoster Square to see the baby animal bronzes and read my library book in the fresh air, and wandered over to Smithfield to have a nose at how the museum move is coming along; I will be roughly ten minutes’ walk away when it opens (hopefully at least, and providing all continues as planned).
The next couple of weeks sees Easter creeping up earlier than usual plus the clocks going forward – a combination of hot cross buns, large dinners, Bank Holiday films and decorating jobs is planned and my phone will be off from Thursday evening onwards. The other main job planned for the weekend is to finally get some new photos sorted, a job which was actually planned for last weekend until I realised that I’d taken suitcases full of potential things to wear back up to my Scarborough flat months ago so I had less to move, and I haven’t brought them back. Duh.
Easter update soon! I’ll also take this chance to apologise for my sometimes hit-and-miss final directions over the last few weeks as I’m still learning the surrounding street names, but to be fair if you went to the location you were asked to in the first place so I knew where you were rather than calling from two streets away in an unknown direction, I’d make a much better job of them. Just a suggestion.
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| Monday, February 12th 2024 |
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| back to square one... |
So after four (mostly happy, if expensive) years, last week saw me close the door to my Monument flat for the final time, although to be fair I haven’t been living in it for almost a month.
It had it’s faults – greedy bastard landlords, an awful heating and hot water system, view of a brick wall – but handing back the keys on my first London home was still a bit of a wrench, not least because moving house is absolutely fucking awful. Plus it was very handy for Assenheims.
However, the worst of the moving nightmare is now well behind me (fingers crossed) and what we do now have is a new location not too far away, limitless heating and hot water and a flat that couldn’t be more different – yay! All I need to do is pull my finger out and get back to a normal work routine, not to mention another go at some pictures now I have a few more backdrops to choose from. Hopefully both will be this week – there is still a fair bit to do, but in my (considerable) experience most visitors don’t really care if the place has piles of stuff everywhere a few boxes kicking about and the only person who does is me.
The all-consuming terror of starting work in an unfamiliar set up is not to be underestimated – even back in the hotel days a new venue was stress personified right up until the first booking, and I will be going cautiously for the first few weeks for the sake of my sanity, if nothing else. That feeling that everybody within a quarter mile knows exactly what you’re doing is not fun, but just like the mess it goes away and (depending on who’s visiting) generally sooner rather than later.
Meanwhile, I have been exploring my new neighbourhood! This has included joining the Barbican (which to be fair, I’ve been meaning to do for years), finding the recycling centre, the Post Office and the Aldi (praise be!) and chasing a few pokémons around Bunhill Fields. I have also found Whitecross Street Market, where I plan to spend a few quid on lunches when I don’t have much on in the afternoon, and discovered that I can be on the Elizabeth Line in nine minutes from standing outside my flat door, which is handy to say the least.
As the above suggests, incalls are being limited to fairly low numbers for a while so that everybody (me) can find their feet, get used to the directions and generally calm down – this doesn’t mean any real difference to the booking process for most, but if the sort of text you generally send doesn’t result in an answer, it’s got even less chance now. Just try to sound like a sensible adult who read (at least some of) the site and everybody gets what they want.
More soon! The boxes of oddbod bits I don’t know what to do with but don’t want to throw away won’t sort themselves… |
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| Monday, January 22nd 2024 |
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| birthday |
Well I try not to miss a birthday blog, even if it’s an exceptionally brief one out of sheer necessity.
As a fair few will know, the next couple of weeks will be my last at Monument; the extortionate rent got too ridiculous in the end and having found more flat for less money just up the road, I’m off! The good news is I will be barely spitting distance away at Moorgate (if you’re coming from the East) or alternatively Barbican (if you’re coming from the West, and also if you have no sense of direction). The difference in the two distances is negligible, to say the least.
Today has been spent doing my usual Monday volunteering followed by a suitcase run between flats, a spot of decorating in my new bedroom and some flat pack assembly in front of Family Guy. I can confidently say I’ve had far worse birthdays, although my planned trip to check out the Barbican cinema practically next door was thwarted by a rogue bedside cabinet. I’ll go next Monday.
I will be playing the next couple of weeks entirely by ear as (and which anybody who has moved house will know only too well) I have a million things to do and even more to clean, but fingers crossed it will be back to business as usual in all-new surroundings asap! For now, it’s as much notice as possible please; it could be said that I have a lot on.
More soon! It’s going to be a frazzled couple of weeks, but it’ll be worth it.
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| Sunday, December 31st 2023 |
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| the end of no man's land... |
And with that, we move into 2024 and Christmas is over with for another year, although as somebody who favours peace and quiet above anything else it’s not a particularly frenetic time of year and this one was no exception. Next year I may up the ante a little, and get dressed at some point between December 23rd and Boxing Day.
After a week of doing virtually nothing bar eating and watching TV I am happy to be easing back into things, and after the disaster that was last New Years’ Eve I planned today with far more care, made easier by it being a Sunday and therefore no possibility of bookings. I checked my bloody order properly before I left Waitrose this year, too.
Tree will be departing on Tuesday, so tomorrow will be spent taking everything down and tidying up, with an outing to see either Priscilla or Casablanca providing a mid afternoon break; I managed to doublebook myself so the decision will be mine to make at about half past two! I may set off a bit early and see the New Year’s Day parade on the way, and I may also take the rest of my trifle with me (I keep a special ice cream spoon in my bag at all times, for reasons anyone who has suffered the new wooden ones now provided at Cineworld will have no trouble understanding).
For now, by rights I should currently be on Waterloo Bridge awaiting the fireworks rather than sitting on my sofa; I walked back through my door roughly an hour and a half after walking out of it having turned the corner off Kingsway and arrived at such complete pandemonium I gave up even trying to find which of the queues I was supposed to be in, let alone trying to find the back of it.
Some forty minutes of wandering around Aldwych in circles looking in vain for signs and remaining none the wiser, I remembered that fuck this for a game of soldiers is the only sensible answer to some situations and despite having to walk home, I’m happy with my choice. They were still queuing next to me when I passed the Royal Courts Of Justice at around 9.30pm, if that gives anybody an idea.
Meanwhile I have the post-Christmas Pringles, cheese and dates, the tail end of a tub of Heroes and a duvet in front of a large flat screen TV. Things could definitely be worse.
More soon. Happy New Year!
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| Tuesday, December 19th 2023 |
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| not long now... |
The season is well underway, the Christmas break looms ever closer and I am getting very much into the Christmas spirit, hastened by a special trip to see everybody’s favourite festive tale of suicide and financial ruin It’s a Wonderful Life at the Prince Charles last Wednesday evening.
I even managed a poke around the Fortnum’s Christmas shop pretending I could afford things on the way, and I will be back at the PCC tomorrow for the Muppet Christmas Carol singalong (followed by the new Godzilla over the road at Cineworld, a sterling double bill and pure dumb luck that I got a seat at the former). I will hopefully get a chance to nip down to Battersea Power Station to see David Hockney’s ipad Christmas trees en route (and if I do, there will be a picture!); at least that’s the plan, and we all know what normally happens to those.
Today marks the start of my final working week before a well deserved few days off, and while it won’t all be R&R (and a lot of F; every December I resolve that I will not spend a ridiculous amount at M&S, Konditor and this year Morrisons, and every December the grocery bill gets higher), I will return next week hopefully rested and revived after what’s been a far busier month than I’d anticipated. I may look even more like a bouncy castle than I do now, but that’s really par for the course, and I doubt I’ll be on my own.
A last bit of housekeeping then, I will be packing up in good time on Thursday 21st unless somebody declares their interest by lunchtime or so, and as far as next week goes my phone will be off from then until lunchtime-ish on Thursday 28th. This means that texting at 5pm expecting to turn up at 6pm is not going to happen (not that it does anyway, as a general rule). New Year is currently a play-it-by-ear situation which depends largely on the time I can be bothered to get up on the second of January, so again, I’d advise booking in good time.
A brief update I know (and there is more on the proper blog which wouldn't pass muster under the rules here), but there's things to do! More soon...
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| Tuesday, December 5th 2023 |
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| five gold rings... |
Well it is the fifth day of Christmas after all, and I am freshly back from a good singsong at the Felix Project carol service in South Ken last night (which has given me an irredeemably sore throat today and necessitated a bit of a rest, but not to worry).
Some (very) quick updates then now December is here! My Christmas tree is on the way – Tree’s third Christmas sharing my living room is likely to be her last (since she’s getting a bit big), so I will be going all out with the baubles as befits the occasion, and next year we can start all over again with a little one! ETA is on Friday at a time anywhere between 9am and 6pm, so anybody wanting to book might wind up helping...
Like many others I was poleaxed by recent news that not just the Caramac but the red Bounty bars are no more – and efforts to build a stockpile of either have sadly been fruitless – but the growing stash of Christmas chocolate is building nicely alongside everything else, and preparations for a bit of a break are ticking along too. I have decided to flirt with disaster again by ordering New Year food from Waitrose even after they sent me away without the main components last year, and all travel, activities and other Christmas must-haves are booked (I think).
As anybody who fancies a wander over to my site and the proper blog (rather than edited highlights hacked about and copypasted here) will find, the Christmas blog page is up with available dates and details, and the next two-and-a-bit weeks will (hopefully) be calm, peaceful and relaxing. There is some more exciting news on the way but it can wait, and it’s business as usual for now! I will be here all weekend for a change, so anybody at a loose end on Saturday is welcome to get in touch too.
More soon! I’ll try to keep everything posted as and when so we all know where we are, and for everything else there’s text messages. Thank God for text messages.
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| Thursday, November 30th 2023 |
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| I went, I saw and I conquered! |
And some pictorial proof above from the top floor of One Canada Square and with even more thanks to everybody who contributed; 48 floors and 1031 steps later we have (so far) raised £470 for the Felix Project, and with a bit more to come in yet! For the stats fans, I did it in twelve minutes and twenty three seconds and I have no idea how either. The promise of mince pies, crisps and beer at the top played it’s part.
It’s been a lively couple of weeks, with the stair climb spliced between the Chemical Brothers at the start of the month (OK, but I left early after giving up trying to see past the six foot four bloke who wound up immediately – and I mean nose-between-his-shoulder-blades immediately - in front of me no matter how often I moved), a good few cinema trips including more Nicolas Cage, and the highlight last weekend with my enduring favourites Prodigy, all the way up at Ally Pally.
I think it’s ten years at least since I last trekked up to AP, but it doesn’t get any quicker or easier for anybody who doesn’t live within a few minutes’ walk and having jumped up and down a lot for almost two hours at the end of an already-long day I then had the monumental pain in the arse of a ninety minute journey to do the six miles home. It was still worth it, even if I was more tired the following day than I was after the stair climb.
Christmas is creeping up on us all; I will provisionally be here and available until end of play on Thursday 21st December and then back from Friday 29th/possibly late afternoon Thursday 28th if all goes according to plan (if I get to it I’ll stick the Christmas hours page up too). This does not mean I will be sitting around the flat in my work clothes with everything primed for bookings any more than I do the rest of the time – the ‘now?’ brigade have been out in force this week, and be assured it will get you nowhere. I would include a reminder for Adultwork users to just try reading the bloody page properly and then you’ll likely get what you want, but as ever, there is just no point.
I also managed a trip over to the West End to see the Christmas lights and Selfridge’s windows; a lengthy ride on the 139 bus and a lasagne at Waterloo later I was definitely ready to get festive. A free mince pie workshop at Bread Ahead followed last Sunday, and this coming week includes the Felix Project Carol Service and the tree lighting over at Trafalgar Square (availability permitting) – I will endeavour not to burn out too early, but given that I spend most of the actual day on the sofa eating my body weight in pretty much everything, Christmas activities need to be worked in in good time.
*this is the point where Song Of The Week goes on my normal blog, so as I can't post videos here I'll reclaim the space here to apologise for the squares on the Leadenhall Market photo above. People (verboten) are under them, for anybody who was wondering*
More soon! The heating is definitely on…
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| Wednesday, November 1st 2023 |
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| and (as promised) the winner is... |
...Grazer! All hail the fat bear Queen!
The annual cinema-fest which makes up October is at an end, and with a side trip to the opera too! Despite the appalling weather, I wasn’t going to pass up a half price ticket to the opening night of La Traviata at the Coliseum, especially when the finish time coincides neatly with the nearby Itsu’s daily half price hometime sale. Sushi for everyone!
Film highlight of the month has certainly been Late Night With The Devil (which will hopefully get some distribution so I can see it again), although FrightFest's Halloween offering managed a few crackers over last Friday night and all day Saturday. I even stayed for the last film instead of bailing and was glad I did, even if it was mostly to try and avoid the rain (had I left early I would have avoided the Central Line night tube though, so it was all a bit academic in the end and Soho on the nearest Saturday to Halloween is pretty good value in itself, after all).
Training for the Santa Stair Climb continues despite the endless rain; the stairmaster at the gym will never be a favourite of mine and I won’t be sorry to see the back of it, but as anybody familiar with the Felix Project will know it’s for a very good cause. Thank you again to everybody who has donated – I’ll be getting some far more enjoyable exercise on Saturday courtesy of the Chemical Brothers over at the O2 – it’s been far too long, and I cannot wait. Bring on the lasers!
This week has also seen the traditional pre-Christmas clearout and eBay sale/charity donation/recycling drive get properly underway; all was going splendidly until Lego decided to mock and torment me by releasing the brand new Natural History Museum set early. A combination of two of my favourite things is going to be seriously difficult to pass up, even if it means having to build it on the floor just for the space (and having just disassembled the Palace Cinema I do have a little bit of room), so some avoidance of Lego related anything will be the modus for the next few weeks. Or I could just jog my memory by looking at my AMEX bill.
My plans this weekend mean a bit of availability on Saturday for a change – let me know! Next week may be hit and miss for reasons beyond my control, but I’ll do my best and in the meantime, I’m going to have yet another crack at some new pictures if the sun comes out again – getting up in daylight over the last few weeks after weeks of the alarm going off in pitch darkness has been delightful, even if it won’t be for long. C’est la vie (and the onset of Autumn Proper suits me just fine in every other conceivable way, to be fair).
Halloween is done with, the clocks have gone back (so the blinds are being drawn at 4pm) and I will be doing a lot of hibernating – come and join in!
More soon…
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| Sunday, October 8th 2023 |
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| stairs, premieres, & very fat bears... |
And it’s October! I began the month with a visit to the Lookout at 8 Bishopsgate, one of the newest ways to take a long ride in a lift and with a lovely view (although sadly not of my building, unlike the Walkie Talkie’s Sky Garden); the viewing gallery at the Twenty Two has opened since which is higher still, but fifty floors up is fine to be getting on with.
No stairs were involved either on the way up or the way down so an impromptu rehearsal for the Santa Stair Climb wasn’t on the cards, but I can live with it. Training continues and the total raised so far is now over £250 – to everybody reading who has contributed, it makes a huge difference (and to anybody who hasn’t – I will point out that I’m going to Canary Wharf so you don’t have to). If nothing else I’ve rediscovered my love of the spin class, which is a bit like clubbing during the day and for the middle aged (coincidentally daytime clubbing is exactly what I will be doing the very day before the Santa Stair Climb, timings being what they are).
The 2023 London Film Festival began last Wednesday, but due to various spanners in the works and general annoying circumstances I’ve yet to see a single festival film! I will be getting straight into the spirit of things starting tomorrow with a two film day; dashing between different venues to make a second (or third) festival film has always been one of the fun parts and I’ve yet to mistime it, although getting from the BFI to the Ciné Lumière in South Ken on forty minutes a few years was a very close call (I made it, but only just).
It may yet be a three film day since my second venue is the Prince Charles Cinema, and if I’m walking out of there around half past eight I may as well give my Cineworld Unlimited card a flex. I had idly planned rounding off the evening with the chirpy-but-nasty Saw X, but after deciding to down tools early on Friday I’ve both already seen it, AND followed it up with apple pie and custard in the café a few minutes away which cost less than an ice cream would have been at Cineworld – result. The LFF itinerary for the rest of this week is mostly evening screenings and I’ll be here on Saturday too, so business will be pretty much as usual if a little earlier for the daily cut offs (definitely on Tuesday, at least).
Apropos of nothing in particular, over in Alaska it turns out that Fat Bear Week is drawing to a close – with heartfelt thanks to the person who drew it to my attention and brightened up my day. My vote has stayed with Grazer (bear 128), but only the fattest bear can triumph, and I will be following the results with keen interest (I promise to announce the winner here; I sincerely hope the prize is salmon). [Unfortunately - as ever - I can't include a link with the details on here so it's all a bit redundant, but there's one on the proper blog for those with the sense to go to my site and find it].
More soon! I’ll see you on the red carpet…
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| What is your starsign? |
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 |
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| What is your Primary Language? |
English. Of sorts. |
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| What is your Secondary Language? |
A little French, and even less Mandarin |
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| How would you describe your non-binary gender? |
NA |
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| What is your favourite colour? |
Pink |
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| Who is your favourite celebrity? |
Patrick Bateman |
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| What is your best feature? |
Eyes |
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| What three words best describe your personality? |
Honest, friendly, warm. |
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| What is your favourite food? |
Haggis. Or pretty much anything. |
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| What is your favourite drink? |
Sangria |
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| What is your favourite film? |
Jackie Brown |
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| What is your favourite TV programme? |
The Boys |
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| What are your favourite flowers? |
Peonies |
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| What is your favourite perfume? |
Parisienne by YSL |
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| What is your favourite gift? |
Anything! Especially Diptyque candles |
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| What is your favourite holiday destination? |
New York |
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| What is your ethnicity? |
Caucasian (White) |
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| What is the colour of your eyes? |
Blue |
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| What is the colour of your hair? |
Red |
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| What length is your hair? |
Long |
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| How would you describe your body type? |
Curvy |
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| How tall are you? |
5'3" |
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| How much do you weigh? |
9½st |
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| What is your leg measurement? |
30" |
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| What is your shoe size? |
4 |
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| What is your dress size? |
10 |
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| What size is your chest? |
32" |
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| What is your waist measurement? |
26" |
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| What is your hips measurement? |
34" |
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| What is your bra cup-size? |
FF |
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| How would you describe the size of your breasts? |
Very Large |
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| Are your breasts natural or enhanced? |
Natural |
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| How is your pubic hair fashioned? |
Natural |
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| Do you smoke? |
No |
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| Do you have any tattoos or piercings? |
Both |
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| If you have tattoos or piercings, how discreet are they |
Discrete |
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| What times are you always available? |
10am until 6pm weekdays (with reasonable notice) |
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| Will you do overnight bookings? |
NA |
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| List of Towns/Areas you will visit |
I'll travel for an hour within reason and with enough notice, subject to minimum booking duration. |
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| How long are you prepared to travel for? |
1hr |
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| Nearest rail station? |
Moorgate or Barbican |
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| What sort of men turn you on? |
Genuine men who are openminded, intelligent and funny. |
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| What sort of women turn you on? |
Macarena Gómez. Not in the tedious fake lesbo of-course-they're-all-really-bi sense which normally prevails on these hallowed pages, but I could happily sit and stare at her for hours. Oh, and Christina Hendricks. |
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| Where would you most like to have sex? |
Here's fine with me? |
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| What is your biggest turn on? |
Intelligence, humour and perfect manners. |
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| The most sensitive part of my anatomy is? |
My faith in human nature. |
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| Describe the experience (when and where) |
Dull. I've learnt a lot in thirty years! |
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| What sexual activity do you enjoy the most? |
Pretty much all bar RO - I'm a game girl. |
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| When is your libido at its highest? |
When queuing in the bank, obviously. |
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